Jessi (she/her) has a story to tell, and she’s proud of it. She came to FareStart in 2018 on work release from prison, completed FareStart’s culinary job training program, secured permanent housing and a job, and eventually made her way back to FareStart as a prep cook in our Community & Schools Meals kitchen where she’s been working for the past two years. She bought a car, adopted a dog named Saint and now, at the age of almost 53, she’s gone back to school to become a veterinarian technician.
“It’s been building since I came to FareStart. They gave me another shot,” says Jessi. “The support that I get from FareStart makes it easier to do the things that I need to do that I’m still afraid to do.”
FareStart helped Jessi with mental health counseling, housing through Jubilee Women’s Center, paid work release, life skills training, career counseling and resume building. When Jessi got sick with bronchitis, FareStart helped her find a doctor. But most importantly, Jessi learned that there were people out there that had her back and wanted her to succeed.
“They were always super gracious and supportive, whether it was when I just had had enough or when I didn’t understand. There were people to take me aside and show me. ‘Okay, just because you do it differently doesn’t mean you do it wrong.’ They’ve never questioned any decision that I’ve made. They just want to help me forward.”
Never Going Back Again
Jessi’s path took a detour in her late 40’s which she has worked hard to course correct. She had raised four kids with her ex-husband before she got caught up in a dysfunctional relationship. “It was one of those relationships where you give everything, and you wind up with nothing and you don’t realize how much they’re eroding your confidence and eroding your self-worth. And I swear, it’s like a process where you don’t see it happening until it’s too far gone. Because now you have no friends, you have no family, you have nothing but this person who treats you horribly. And I kept making excuses for him.”
One day the emotional abuse turned physical, and Jessi fought back. “I was mad. I was mad as hell. You put your hands on me in my own home. Oh, no, no, no. And it just went from bad to worse.” Jessi grabbed a gun to defend herself and her dog and ended up being charged for assault with a deadly weapon. She fled the warrant but was caught a year later and spent the next three years in prison.
“Prison is not nice, especially when you’re in maximum security, when you have never been in trouble before. I mean, I was in with people who had murdered people and things like that, people who were never getting out.”
Jessi’s time in prison gave her plenty of time to think about what she wanted in life. “That’s a long time to think over what life choices you’ve made and who you want to allow in your life. And so when I got out, I figured I’m never going back again.”
Rising to Her Potential
But re-entry wasn’t easy. “I think the reason I was so scared to come back out into the world is the average person makes 50 to 85 decisions a day. The average incarcerated person makes less than ten. And if you don’t start making decisions when you get out, somebody else can make them for you. And they’re not going to be the decisions you want. So I made better choices on whom I associated with. I stayed in touch with the people who were doing well.”
Jessi has worked hard to repair her relationship with her kids. “I had to build that. I had to teach my children to trust me again.” She now spends time with all of them, as well as with her six grandchildren. And when FareStart asked her to come back and work in the kitchen, Jessi jumped at the chance. She thought: “They need me. I’m coming back.”
Students’ #1 Cheerleader
Jessi now works alongside FareStart students who are going through the Food Pathways training program, acting as their #1 cheerleader. “I always believed in the mission at FareStart, not just feeding people, but rehabilitating people so that they can get back out into the world. It’s never just the job and it’s never just the food. But food does bring people together. I believe that. And a lot of students will tell me: ‘I’m going through the program. I don’t know if I will stay in the kitchen.’ But the life skills they learn translate to any job. And that’s always been helpful for me.”
“I wouldn’t have come this far without FareStart Chef Laura pushing me, and I would’ve settled” Jessi reflects. “I would’ve wound up someplace I wasn’t happy. If Chef takes the time to invest in you and to say anything to you, that means that they see more than you see. They’re going to believe in you until you can believe in yourself. And sometimes it is so hard to see what they see. You’re like, ‘Oh no, I’m this.’ And they’re like, ‘No, but you could be this. What is holding you back? Believe in yourself like I believe in you and you’re going to see a huge difference.’”
Jessi has three Batman tattoos and posters all over her home – a reminder that everyone needs a hero. “You have to believe in something bigger than yourself. I’m never going to be a billionaire. But I pay my own tuition. There are days that we eat peanut butter, but hey, I’m happy every day. Breathing free air and being above ground is a good day.”
